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Reiko has slept for the last 2 days now, thanks to morphine. I brought him in to be xrayed again today because I was worried that the break got worse, his whole leg was completely swollen and the foot was so puffy and hard, he cries very hard anytime he is moved. So I brought him in, and nothing new showed on the xray, so I just was told to give him for morphine for the pain and to resplint it. He slept the afternoon away again today, and is awake for now, he just got his new dose of morphine, so I am assuming it won't be very long, but right now is a good moment, cause he is actually smiling at me, for the first time today! I knew he was in alot of pain last night because he actually slept through the night pretty much, woke up at 1230 for some more morphine and a bottle then slept til 1030 this morning. He never ever sleeps like this! This seems to be a really bad fracture for him, he is not usually so upset everytime he moves.

So I have lost a total of 5lbs so far, eating really healthy and feeling good. although its taking a bit to get my stomach used to eating smaller portions of food and I am hungry alot, but I am eating every 2hours, I am doing really good with this though, I feel like this time is meant to work. I am usually not to commited, unless it has been a quick fix diet, like last years milk shake diet thing that was like 250$, I lost 11lbs but it was because I was consuming 200 calories a day! ughhh, do not miss that one, not to mention gained it right back. I eat healthy foods all day, cucumber, raspberries, almonds, salads with no dressing, fish, chicken, tuna, peppers, etc..tonight felt like a treat but it was well within my points, Derek made a 5pt per slice bbq chicken pizza on whole wheat crust, and it was AMAZING!! I had a salad with it, drank my water and feel full! Tonight I am going to go swimming at 8 and do 25laps, hopefully..its been about a month since I last did laps.

Kai has been a good boy, we are doing lots of reading lately, but I have come to realise he does not know colours or shapes, well some shapes. He can count to like 15, but he always mixes up the colours and shapes. I should have done more with him as he has grown older. But he will get it, it will just take some time. He has been full of big hugs and kisses and cuddles, I love it. But bedtime is getting harder, he is trying to find more ways to stay up later and it can get so frustrating, but I realise how very very lucky I am to have my son, I think back to little Emmett Trapp, he passed away in August, went wandering out of his house and was found a few days later, he was napping with his mother at the time he went missing, and I always have this guilt when I get angry with him, I feel like I should never ever take for granted the fact that my son wants to read with me, or sing or just cuddle, when some people lose their children so unfairly. Ok time to feed Reiko his milk, he loves milk!! ttyl